I have been a Christian for many years, but I made a terrible mistake back in college and cannot forgive myself. I had an abortion. I know a lot of people do, but I knew better. I know it is wrong. I believe I took an innocent life and the guilt of it goes with me every day. I know God has forgiven me, because the Bible says He will. But I cannot forgive myself. How can I let go of this and stop letting that one mistake define me? Rhonda
--------------Rhonda, I can tell how much this grieves you and I'll bet you've cried buckets of tears over it. The fact that it grieves you so much tells me that your heart is tender toward God and your spirit is sensitive to His will.
I am so sorry you have carried this load of shame for so long. Maybe this will help.
Have you ever thought of toxic shame as the flip-side of pride? It feels like humility, doesn't it? But in truth what you are saying is: "I know God can forgive sin, but my standard is higher than God's and I can't forgive it. I know Jesus died to pay the price for all sin, but mine is so big that not even Jesus' sacrifice can fully pay for it, so I have to help him."
Have you ever thought of toxic shame as the flip-side of pride? It feels like humility, doesn't it? But in truth what you are saying is: "I know God can forgive sin, but my standard is higher than God's and I can't forgive it. I know Jesus died to pay the price for all sin, but mine is so big that not even Jesus' sacrifice can fully pay for it, so I have to help him."
When we look at our shame that way it puts it in proper perspective. Satan wants to keep you defeated, convinced that a person who had done what you have could never be fully used of God. That is a lie. When God says He forgives ALL our sin, He means it! (I John 1: 9)
The next time Satan comes at you with his accusations, remind him that your Savior died and rose again so that you could be forgiven of sins just like this. Boldly stand on the truth of God's Word and claim that cleansing.
Claiming forgiveness does not make the consequences of our sin disappear, but it removes the sting of shame that Jesus has already paid for. His death and resurrection are sufficient to cover every sin when we lay it down at the foot of the cross. Confess it, claim His forgiveness, and then turn to walk away in victory.
Claiming forgiveness does not make the consequences of our sin disappear, but it removes the sting of shame that Jesus has already paid for. His death and resurrection are sufficient to cover every sin when we lay it down at the foot of the cross. Confess it, claim His forgiveness, and then turn to walk away in victory.
